The EI Quotient!

 “We often add to our pain and suffering by being over sensitive and over reacting to minor things and sometimes taking things too personally” - Dalai Lama.

Pic courtesy:https://www.dalailama.com/

This is true to a great extent among many of us and with the younger gen in particular. Tiny aggravations add to a major source of suffering. Therapists call it the process “personalizing - A tendency to narrow the psychological field of vision by interpreting or misinterpreting everything that occurs in terms of its impact on us”

Constant stream of positive and negative thoughts along with emotions often bother us. And come to think of it, aren’t we lucky enough to be born as men and women because we enjoy the opportunity of using our intelligence to be positively emotional?

Emotional Intelligence – or EI, as I see it - gets the top priority in my update list,  as I try to keep abreast of what is going on within me and at the same time I am able to decipher, (but not give a feedback unless asked )the lack of EI  which affects the people(negatively) around me.

The self-improvement process, for most of us is limited to chasing education, knowledge, getting experienced in the work we do etc.  We ignore the bigger aspects of emotional mastery.  We prove ourselves   inadequate with the range of emotions we have to deal with every second of our existence. We create situations for us to be angry, insecure, Jealous, overly passionate etc.  It could be either because we do not understand how it can influence our relationships and lives (for the better or worse) or we allow it to exist the way it is with no attempts to improve. Chalta Hai attitude!

My stomach goes in knots when I see some of my friends who Google out everything to seek knowledge on issues such as: why do I get angry, why am I sad or why cannot I manage my emotions, why do I feel insecure,  and what should I do when I am cranky. They also spend their time and money for quick fix solutions by visiting experts who are available for every problem they face with their emotions. And what do they do when their concerns fail? They just sweep their problems under the carpet.

Self awareness appears to be the easiest thing to create, but this can also be the toughest depending on how we deal with our lives.  We have to introspect, spend some time to find out from where and why our concerns or problems arise. Even though our core feelings are only Happiness, Sadness, Anger, Fear and shame,  I really wonder the  innumerable streams of emotions pouring in day in and day out while we are working in office, home, partying, gymming, spending time with friends etc.

Did someone say meditation? Yes, it is a good exercise to think about ourselves. I often do it and find it very useful.

Friends, I love the topic so much and I speak from my heart, rationing the content by limiting myself so that I explore some more and revisit you again.

Till then emotionally yours….

GEETHA SHANKAR

Director- Governing Council PRCI

National Chairperson - YCC