“We often add to our pain and suffering by
being over sensitive and over reacting to minor things and sometimes taking
things too personally” - Dalai Lama.
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| Pic courtesy:https://www.dalailama.com/ |
This is true to a great
extent among many of us and with the younger gen in particular. Tiny
aggravations add to a major source of suffering. Therapists call it the process
“personalizing - A tendency to narrow the psychological field of vision by
interpreting or misinterpreting everything that occurs in terms of its impact
on us”
Constant stream of positive
and negative thoughts along with emotions often bother us. And come to think of
it, aren’t we lucky enough to be born as men and women because we enjoy the
opportunity of using our intelligence to be positively emotional?
Emotional Intelligence – or
EI, as I see it - gets the top priority in my update list, as I try to keep abreast of what is going on
within me and at the same time I am able to decipher, (but not give a feedback
unless asked )the lack of EI which
affects the people(negatively) around me.
The self-improvement
process, for most of us is limited to chasing education, knowledge, getting experienced
in the work we do etc. We ignore the
bigger aspects of emotional mastery. We
prove ourselves inadequate with the range of emotions we have
to deal with every second of our existence. We create situations for us to be
angry, insecure, Jealous, overly passionate etc. It could be either because we do not
understand how it can influence our relationships and lives (for the better or worse)
or we allow it to exist the way it is with no attempts to improve. Chalta Hai attitude!
My stomach goes in knots
when I see some of my friends who Google out everything to seek knowledge on
issues such as: why do I get angry, why
am I sad or why cannot I manage my emotions, why do I feel insecure, and what should I do when I am cranky.
They also spend their time and money for quick fix solutions by visiting
experts who are available for every problem they face with their emotions. And
what do they do when their concerns fail? They just sweep their problems under
the carpet.
Self awareness appears to be
the easiest thing to create, but this can also be the toughest depending on how
we deal with our lives. We have to
introspect, spend some time to find out from where and why our concerns or
problems arise. Even though our core feelings are only Happiness, Sadness,
Anger, Fear and shame, I really wonder
the innumerable streams of emotions
pouring in day in and day out while we are working in office, home, partying,
gymming, spending time with friends etc.
Did someone say meditation?
Yes, it is a good exercise to think about ourselves. I often do it and find it
very useful.
Friends, I love the topic so
much and I speak from my heart, rationing the content by limiting myself so
that I explore some more and revisit you again.
Till then emotionally
yours….
GEETHA SHANKAR
Director- Governing Council
PRCI
National Chairperson - YCC
